Greetings and thank you for visiting Far From Perfect Marriage!
My name is Julienne Exemar (Jay).
For a long time, I have been particularly interested in what makes marriage relationships work and what makes them fail. Hence the reason I enrolled in graduate school, to pursue a degree in Marriage & Family Counseling, which has helped to shape my own marriage relationship in many ways than one.
I have been married now for 7 years! My husband and I have a beautiful son together who is now 5 1/2. In my marriage, I have endured and experienced my share of challenges. Some of these challenges had cut so deeply that I had lost complete hope in my marriage, my partner, myself, and in my spirituality. I almost convinced myself that there was no way out other than suicide. Although I have gained back all hope and I am grateful to have found myself again! There is still much work to be done individually and especially in my marriage. I now have a sense of appreciation for my relationship, my partner, and I’ve also gained a new level of self-worth and esteem for myself. Just the other day, I sat back reflecting on how far I have come in this marital journey. Looking back, I realized how much I contributed to a lot of the conflicts that existed between my spouse and me. I was guilty of many inappropriate behaviors, from the way I criticized my spouse to the way I rejected him in the past, which he translated as “disrespect”. This affected our relationship in many ways, including the way he related to me. As a result of my behaviors, there was plenty of distance between us. Going through many marital struggles and pain has taught and helped me to grow and mature individually, mentally, and emotionally. I learn alot doing this marriage thing and I am still learning to this very day!
I wanted to create a blog space where I could share my personal experience of the work I did to overcame some of the UGLIEST parts of my marriage and what I am doing now to maintain and enhance my marital relationship. I’ll be sharing about how I cope with some of the struggles that still exist in my marriage and about the day to day challenges of being a wife, mother, family member, student, friend, worker, individual, and much more. My aim is to empower, encourage, motivate, support, and inspire through my sharing with you.
While considering the degree of vulnerability and transparency it would require for me to be completely open, I felt some apprehension, and I almost second guessed doing this blog. I have had this developed for over seven months but could not seem to click the launch tap. I believe that my desire to encourage and empower others who might be struggling with pain and suffering in their marriage through my sharing makes it all worth the risk. So as I look past my apprehension, I hope my sharing brings a fresh new perspective to you and aids in helping you cope a little bit better than before.
This blog is for anyone and everyone interested in marriage! I dedicate it to those who are married and especially for those in unhappy marriages. May the information I share about my marriage and what I have learned through my studies, help to demonstrate some of what it takes to make saying “I do” a success.
Although your marriage may be far from perfect, marital success is still possible! All you need is the willingness to be open and to put in the work.
